"Getting rid of everything that doesn’t matter allows you to remember who you are. Simplicity doesn’t change who you are, it brings you back to who you are."

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Master Of My Domain

SM and I have been sharing his desktop computer for about 8 months now.  The old laptop that I'd inherited from Mom ("Hey Mom") was about 9 years old and was moving at the speed of slug. 

So I stopped using it.

Sharing SM's office desktop computer wasn't too bad.  We would jockey for time and my personal rule was that if he wandered within 5 feet of his office, I'd jump up and ask if he needed me up and out and I was gone.  It worked out pretty well but I missed having my own space and also missed having the luxury of taking my laptop outside and sitting on the back porch surfing and enjoying the day.

When the time came to buy, SM wondered if I should consider a tablet.  But I like a laptop.  I like having the keyboard and a wide screen.  This HP is 17" across and the keyboard has nice big key's for my fumbly fingers.  We hooked up a separate mouse though as I'm not that into the touch pad unless I'm outside.  As I mentioned before, this puppy is fast.  I'm LOVING it. 

But what I love the most is that I'm back in my nook.

My nook is my kitchen table.  We have a galley kitchen and the kitchen table sits in a bay window area.  Windows all around with a southern exposure.  Lots of sun which is great in the winter, plus I can see everything that's going on inside and out. 

It got me to thinking though, "Why the kitchen?"  Out of every room in the house, why is this the place that I like hang out in?  Which then got me to thinking that SM and I really have this house broken into personal spaces.  His and Hers.  This belongs to me.  My domain.

My favorite places are on the east side of the house.  The old dining room which I converted into the "Dog-TV" room where I have an old couch that the dogs lay on and I can watch my TV shows.  You know, the stuff that annoys the crap out of a man like "The Real Housewives." 

Then there's the kitchen and nook where I'm sitting now.  I spend most of my inside time here in these two rooms.  I suppose that the laundry room and pantry are mine too.  My other favorite place is in the backyard and porch, of course.

SM occupies the central area of the house.  The main living room is his, with his big screen TV and comfy sofa and recliners.  I wander in there from time to time if he's watching a show I'm interested in.  Mostly he watches stuff that annoys the crap out of a girl like sports, cartoons and military-history stuff.  Then there's his office and spare room which is jammed packed with all his business crap.  Oh.  Let's not forget the garage.  If I didn't need to go out there for stuff in the freezers, I wouldn't bother.

That just leaves the master bed and bath, which we share of course.  And the spare bedroom and bathroom which is really neutral territory.

Funny thing is, is that my areas are pretty tidy as I tend to have a more organized personality.  SM's area are a cluttered, disorganized mess.  Any attempts I make to straighten things up are temporary at best.  If things get really bad, I usually give a warning shot over SM's head. 

"Deal with it or I will" is the threat that I'll toss out there when I just can't take it anymore.

Sometimes he "deals with it" but most times he doesn't.  I started to wonder if he was doing this on purpose, but I don't think so.  His brain just doesn't work that way. 

So I threaten again just before action is taken and then it's "Game On."  Your ass is mine. 

I've learned though to  only tackle his messes while SM is still in the house.  I made the mistake once of gutting the garage while he was out of town at a weekend convention.  I pulled everything out and put it all back in a way that made perfect sense to me.  SM couldn't find a thing after that and complained about it for months.  Learned MY lesson after that.  Never mess with his messes unless he's there to observe.

So I'm back in my nook and I'm happy as a clam about it.

Does it work this way at your house?


  1. Well, I'd have to say that the only domains DH has is the garage and, hmmmm, well, maybe outside where he keeps all the tractor / farm equipment. The kitchen is a high-casualty area because if you're in my way while I'm in the kitchen, you're apt to get a limb hacked off or body-checked into the fridge.
    Oh. He does get one of the bathrooms.

  2. My husband took over a spare bedroom as his man cave. I go in about once a month to vacuum and shovel the dust off of his furniture. My computer desk takes up the spot in the kitchen that was meant for a table, but with just the two of us, and a breakfast bar and a dining room table, who needs another table? I also have my TV near my desk, so the entire kitchen area is my domain. We also have his and hers bathrooms. My granddaughter was here the other day and was using my bathroom. I had to go use the other one, and I felt absolutely out of place and uncomfortable in there! We've lived her over 20 years, and I doubt I've used that main bathroom more than a couple of times.