My back is turned away from the street as the pups sniff over a particularly delectable "mailbox" of messages left by the other dogs in the hood.
It's very dark.
Just me, the dogs and the crickets.
Or so I thought.
We turn back to the street and freeze.
I tighten the leashes as I make out the shape of a tall man across the street, walking slowly towards us about 30 feet away.
He's weaving slowly down the road.
My adrenaline picks up as I asses the situation.
The dogs are on full alert but not growling.
Waiting.
I always wear a halogen flashlight strapped to my forearm when I'm walking so tilted my arm up and gave the guy a face full of my high-beam.
Startled, the guy looks up and says "Morning" as he passes.
I can see the soft glow of a cell phone in his hand.
"Really?" I think to myself.
He must've been reading something while he walked, weaving around.
Geez, Dude...Put it away and enjoy your morning walk like a normal person!
As the dogs and I turned and moved away to continue our walk, I reflect on how close this guy came to danger.
You see, my friends, I am a lethal weapon.
I have a bag of freshly deposited poo in my hand.
You don't want to mess with me.
Face first, baby.
Trust me...That'll make the bad guys run @;)
I hope he's counting his blessings. With my luck, all three of mine would turn and run - dragging me behind.
ReplyDeleteHey, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. (Doggie doo-doo, get it?) Face first would have been the way to go had the situation warranted it. You go, girl!
ReplyDeleteThis post truly made me laugh out loud! My pre-dawn walks are always a little creepy because the neighborhood bats are constantly swooping around my head. I just can't seem to get used to it - I guess I think they're going to bite my neck or something . . . but the dogs don't seem to notice. LOL
ReplyDeleteI am still chuckling. He's lucky he didn't get a face full of "pooper spray".
ReplyDelete